Mud
by Bailadora
Summary: CBPC August.  When a vacation gets boring, Hodgins comes up with the perfect plan.  The only problem is getting Temperance to agree.


**A/N: Okay, I'm not too impressed with this, but whatever. Here goes:**

"Well this blows."

Angela was stating the obvious as she, Hodgins, Zach, Booth and Temperance stared out the window of Hodgins's cabin.

It was Labor Day Weekend, and when they'd asked for time off, Cam too agreed that she had better things to do than work. An emergency meeting was called in Temperance's office to figure out where to go. Nobody had any ideas. They sat around in silence until Hodgins jumped up. "I have a cabin about an hour's drive from here! There'll be plenty of room for all of us. And it's amazing, it never rains there, even when it's wet everywhere else." Zach mumbled about how that was scientifically impossible, but it was decided that the cabin was the perfect place to spend the weekend.

Hodgins had been right about the size of the place. Each person had their own room, though Angela and Hodgins opted to share a bed.

But the weather… the weather he had been wrong about.

It had been hot and sunny throughout the entire week, but the second they stepped foot inside the cabin it started pouring.

That was yesterday. They now stood in front of the floor-to-ceiling windows in the living room, gazing forlornly out into the rain.

Temperance tugged at the baggy shirt and sweatpants that made up her pajamas. "I'm going to go change."

Hodgins checked his watch as she walked away. It was nearly noon. He hadn't realized that they had spent so long sitting on the couch watching cartoons like a bunch of kids.

Just as Temperance closed her bedroom door, the rain stopped. It was eerily quiet without the constant pattering of water drops on the window. Hodgins peered outside. A huge puddle of mud filled the backyard.

"Great," he muttered. "Now we can't even go down to the lake."

"Complete with a yacht, I expect?" Booth teased.

Hodgins crossed his arms over his chest. "Yes, actually."

The four of them fell silent, wondering what to do next. Hodgins, still eyeing the mud puddle, was hit with sudden inspiration.

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"

Booth looked over sideways at him. "I never know what you're thinking."

Zach finally spoke, his eyes also on the on the puddle. "I think I'm thinking what you're thinking." His face was contorted in a sort of frown, like he was concentrating very hard on something.

Hodgins raised his eyebrows. "Oh yeah?"

The creases in Zach's forehead deepened. "We could go out and identify the different species of pond scum."

Hodgins smacked the back of Zach's head.

"Ow, what was that for?" Zach asked, rubbing his head.

"Mud wrestling, man!"

Booth grinned. "Oh yeah. I was sorta thinking that."

He and Hodgins high-fived.

"Uh, hello?" Angela said. "Temperance is never going to agree to this."

Booth's face fell.

"And you would?" Hodgins asked.

"Well yeah," Angela nodded.

"I always knew I loved you."

Zach was still putting two and two together, figuring out for himself what mud wrestling was. His face suddenly light up and he looked over slyly at Angela. He had figured it out. Booth on the other hand looked like a young boy who'd just had candy ripped out of his hands.

Hodgins thought for a moment, then strode determinedly to the kitchen. He walked to the fridge, pulled out a twenty-four pack of Budweiser, and heaved it over to the table where he set it down with a dull _thud._

"You're horrible," Booth said, but he grabbed a beer and twisted off the top.

Hodgins handed a bottle out to Angela, and one to Zach.

"I don't really–"

"Drink it," Hodgins commanded.

"But–"

"We're not trying to get _you _drunk. We're getting Dr. Brennan drunk."

Zach finally took the beer.

Temperance came back to the kitchen wearing a tank top and shorts to find her colleagues standing around the kitchen drinking beers. Angela uncapped one and held it out to her.

"Angela, it's really early for a drink."

Angela swigged from her bottle. "It's five o' clock somewhere, sweetie."

"Yeah, in Mauritania."

"But we're not in Maurit-wherever," Angela pointed out.

"Which is a very good reason to not be drinking."

Angela sighed. "Come on, sweetie. It's just a little beer."

That little beer turned into another little beer, and then another. Somehow Angela got her to drink more and more, yet managed to only have one herself.

Temperance finished her fourth and pushed the empty bottle away. Angela handed another one over.

"Guys I really don't think I should be drinking this much," Temperance said with a slight slur.

"Don't worry," was Angela's response.

As Temperance sipped her fifth and final beer, Angela went of in search of a few bikinis. She brought one back and threw it at the anthropologist. "Go put that one."

Temperance stood up from the table and swayed a little. She grabbed onto her chair for support.

"Oops," Angela whispered and she followed Temperance out of the room.

As Temperance stumbled off down the hall, Zach's conscience finally set in. "Don't you think this is really disrespectful to Dr. Brennan?" he asked.

"Just a little," Hodgins finally said. "But don't you want to see her and Angela wrestle in the mud?"

"Of course, but–"

If looks could kill, Zach would be six feet under.

"She'll forgive us," Hodgins said.

"Eventually," added Booth.

"You guys are just forgetting one little thing," Angela said, coming back into the kitchen wearing a pink string bikini.

All the eyes in the room were on her. "What's that?" Hodgins managed to ask.

"She's drunk. She might not even remember this tomorrow."

"Oh yeah!" Hodgins agreed. Booth nodded enthusiastically.

"Does this mean we can feel less bad about what we're doing?" Zach wondered aloud.

The answer to his question never came. Temperance stood in the doorway, wearing a navy blue bikini identical to Angela's. She didn't stumble as much as she had earlier, but everyone could tell that she wasn't all there mentally.

"Why do I have to wear this?" she asked, looking down at the bikini.

Angela grabbed her arm. "Because we're going outside." She hung back as the group walked outside, taking Hodgins aside. "Look at her." Temperance was gripping Booth's arm to keep from falling over. "This isn't right. I'm her best friend, and look what I did to her."

Hodgins raised a hand to Angela's face and pressed his lips to hers. "I love you," he murmured. And so Angela forgot everything that had been on her mind.

Booth looked down at Temperance, who was clinging to his arm with a strength he didn't know she was capable of. He wasn't sure how he should feel about this: he wanted to see her covered in mud, wearing nothing but a bikini, but he didn't want to see her like this, drunk beyond recognition.

"I've never realized how defined your pectoral muscles are," Temperance said without any detectable slur said as she poked Booth in the chest. "Do you work out?"

"Well, yeah, I…" Booth continued talking but he didn't really hear what he was saying. Temperance couldn't possibly be as drunk as he thought she was, could she?

When they got down to the puddle, Angela took Temperance's hand and led her out to the very middle. She took a few steps back and crouched down. "Okay sweetie, on the count of three you're going to tackle me. One… Two…"

"But Angela, I really don't see any reason to–"

Booth hardly noticed that her slur had returned as Angela glanced at Hodgins one more time before lunging at her, grabbing her around the knees and pulling her down.

She got back to her feet and jumped on top of Angela, wondering why on earth she had just tackled her. The last thing Temperance remembered was the feeling of the cold, squishy mud under her feet and the jeers of Booth, Hodgins, and Zach.

XxXxXxX

Temperance knew that opening her eyes was probably not a good idea, but she did so anyway. The blinding light reawakened her pounding headache and she quickly shut her eyes again. Okay, so sudden movements were out of the question, along with opening her eyes. She would just lay here for a bit, then try again later.

"Oh, sweetie!" Angela cried, her voice piercing Temperance's skull like a knife. "I'm so sorry!"

Temperance very slowly opened her eyes. "What happened?" she asked quietly.

"I'm so sorry," Angela said again.

"I know, you said that already. But what happened?" She rubbed her head, wondering if there was any chance she had been in a car accident.

"By the time your top was off the guys were laughing to hard to see anything anyway."

"_What_?" Oops, that didn't feel too good.

"And even if they could have seen anything, they wouldn't have been able to, because you were really, _really_ muddy."

Temperance tried again. "Angela, _what did I do_?"

Angela smoothed Temperance's hair, which felt a little damp. "I'm really sorry. We got you drunk, then you and I mud wrestled."

Temperance let the words sink in. For some reason, tears sprang up in her eyes. It killed her that Booth had seen her like that. Especially the part where she didn't have a shirt on. Oh god. "Hodgins?" she asked. Angela nodded. "_Zach_?" She dreaded the answer.

"I'm really sorry." That was, what, the fourth time Angela had said that. "Can you ever forgive me?"

Temperance took a deep breath. "Of course. But if you tell anyone about this, I swear I'll…" Well, she wasn't exactly sure what she would do, but she knew it wouldn't be good.

"I'll never tell," Angela swore.

"And make sure the guys know not to tell anyone either."

Angela nodded. "Do you need anything?"

"Some sleep."

Angela pressed a kiss to Temperance's forehead. "I really am sorry."

XxXxXxX

Two days later Temperance was gathering up her things, getting ready to go to work. The doorbell rang just as she was rinsing out a cereal bowl and signing a paper at the same time. She finished what she was doing, the bell still ringing insistently. When she pulled open the door, Booth was standing there, hands in pockets.

"How's my little mud wrestler today?" he asked, smiling.

"You have no proof," Temperance said, turning her back to him and walking back inside. Booth followed.

"How much you wanna bet?" he asked, taking his phone out of his pocket and flipping it open. He pressed a few buttons and held it out to her. A very muddy Temperance was flying across the screen.

She clenched her fists. "If you show these to anyone, I swear I'll–"

Booth grabbed her wrists, grinning. "You'll what? Mud wrestle me?"

"What are you doing here?"

"I'm taking you to work," he answered, dropping her wrists.

"Fine, then hurry up and take me to work."

XxXxXxX

Hodgins, Zach, and Angela were all on the platform when she and Booth arrived. A body was laying on one of the examination tables and Zach was already working on a preliminary examination. Temperance pulled on a pair of gloves and went over to help him. No one said anything about the weekend. Instead they focused on coming up for a nickname for the victim. Burned Billy and Blistered Bob were a few ideas.

As Cam walked up, everyone grew quiet. "How was your vacation?" she asked.

"It was good," Temperance answered quickly. Too quickly.

"Just good?" Cam questioned with raised eyebrows.

"Oh," Booth assured. "It was great."


End file.
